There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
