I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Enjoy the penises
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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