just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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