i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize