I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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