Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Randomize
