id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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