is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
