adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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