I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
We don't watch enough power rangers
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
