They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
