gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Porn is love you can see.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
As shirtless as possible
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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