So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
