....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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