Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
