Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
