My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
