I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
