Screwed.edu
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize