i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
