I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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