Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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