Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
