K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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