You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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