I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Bring me that man meat
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Randomize
