whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
