I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
