i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
