It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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