he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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