you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Randomize
