Do you still have your period?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
