There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
