So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
