Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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