he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I party with great urgency now.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
