So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
