I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
