doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
