my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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