Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
