i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
