She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
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