I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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