I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
