at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
