therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
