It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
