just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
