Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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